The Least of These

For those of you who know Cathy and I well, you know we are passionate about making a difference in the lives of children. In our family, this plays out in our desire to save the world "one child at a time". Just like the boy throwing starfish back into ocean, we cannot make a difference for every child, but will do our best to make a difference in the lives of the children who come into our home.

Of course, as an educator, I have 550 children that I am responsible for from K thru 8th grade. Although "one at a time" would be inadequate to meet the needs of all these students, each child's individual needs must be met if all of them are to succeed.

I was very proud of my wife when she recently struggled with an assignment that included a response to A Modest Proposal by Jonathan Swift. In this satirical commentary on western life in the 18th century, Swift, proposes children be eaten as a solution to both poverty of the mother and overpopulation. Today I am struggling with the fact that Swift's commentary on society's value of children is as applicable today as it was then.

Yes, crimes against children are against the law here in the US and in many parts of the world, the problem is, they still happen and they happen way too frequently. Today I found out that it is highly probable that four of the boys from the streets of Uganda that folks from our church recently worked with on a missions trip were kidnapped and taken to Europe to be part of the sex trade. Not only does this make me sick for these for boys, it makes my heart break that this is such a regular occurrance that without knowing what happened to them, we can assume what happened to them. These children have no value in society, in Uganda and in Europe, and can be harvested like stray animals.

I know that if you are reading this post, you are probably one of my Facebook friends, and share my value of children. You may be asking, "What can I do?" The advice given to me tonight by our pastor that went on this trip and knows these boys...pray that wherever they are, they will find redemption, both for their lives, and for their souls.

Its hard for me to leave something like this in God's hands. It really makes me want to go out and do some ass-whoopin.

So, that's my reflection, no resolution, just frustration and a knot in the pit of my stomach.

However...it does make me stop and ponder the value and sanctity of human life. Even though all of you are willing to sacrifice for children and are appalled at what I've shared, do you really value all human life? Really? Yes, I am asking a trick question here. Many of you would never take the life of anyone else, and those of you that would, only under certain cirumstances, ie: the health and safety of others. My question is, do you value YOUR life? If you are like me, somedays you may get down, feel like you have failed, even wallow in self-pity. Do you know that someone cares about your troubles just like we are concerned about the troubles of children? Human life gets its value not from what society thinks its worth. The doctor and the street urchin are just as valuable in God's eyes. He loves those boys from Uganda, He loves those 550 students in my school, He loves my family, He loves me, He LOVES YOU!

Today's news about these boys, coupled with some sad news regarding the health of one of my students has taken me through a roller-coaster of emotions. Knowing God loves them and loves me is the only thing that will allow me to sleep tonight.

Invincible Grandma?

My grandmother's memorial service was today. It was a beautiful service. I shared the following:

Emmabell Eley, or, as my cousins and I would call her, Grandma. Being somewhere in the middle, birth-order wise, I may not have as many memories as some of my older cousins, and may have a few more than those younger than I, however, due to our being scattered across the country, many of them who would like to be here today are unable, and I hope they will allow me some grace to represent them in sharing a few thoughts.

Over the past four decades I have made many a memory with Grandma and other family members. I have also been told tale after tale of various family escapades and adventures, quite a few that have brought more than a chuckle, and some, of course, that have brought tears. Today you'll hear many words that describe Grandma, and I'm sure each of have you have something coming to mind even as I speak.

When I was younger, much younger, I heard a story that was intended to explain the love that Jesus demonstrated by giving his life so that we might live. The story was of a mother hen. This hen as most hens do, kept her chicks protected under her wings as she covered her nest with her body. The difference in this story is that there was a fire in the barn, and the mother hen perished in the blaze, however, when, the farmer came in and moved her charred body to clean up, her chicks were alive underneath her.

Unconditional, sacrificial, love, for her children and grandchildren was a recurring theme throughout my Grandma's life. She always gave, always protected, never asking for anything in return. The difference between Grandma and the mother hen is that Grandma never died. From a grandchild's perspective, Grandma was “old” even in my earliest memories. When someone is old for 40 years and still has a mind that is sharp as a tack and the spunk to rival a teenager, you believe she is going to live forever. To me, and I'm sure many of my cousins, Grandma was invincible. It was hard to watch her during this last month, when she was no longer able to stand or sit up. I kept looking around the room wanting to take away the kryptonite that someone had snuck in. Still, Grandma had her spunk, right up to the very end. She celebrated in some of the hospice reunions, my cousin Matthew and I who had not seen each other for several years, as well as her four living children spending time together in one place.

Today, please celebrate Grandma's life with me, with us, my cousins and I, and learn from her as well. Show that sacrificial love to one another, its one of life's greatest investments. Have those reunions now, before you're united beside a hospice bed. Give each other a hug and kiss on the cheek, from Grandma.

Fathers' Day

Well, I could have logged on to Cathy's blog, and posted as a guest blogger, but I thought I'd give this a try myself. So.. a little about Fathers' Day...

Admit it, guys, don't you wish your Father's day agenda looked something like this?

• Wake up at (whenever you happen to feel like it)
• Breakfast in bed (biscuits and gravy, bacon, sausage, eggs with a nice hot cup of coffee and just the right amount of cream)
• Your favorite game, race, or PPV movie on TV
• Shower (optional)
• Move from the bed to the comfy chair for the rest of the game, race, or the next movie
• Mid morning snack (if you got out of bed before noon)
• Foot rub (I did say "don't you wish," right?
• More TV or maybe some video games
• Lunch
• Afternoon nap
• Shower, if you didn't get one earlier
• Afternoon snack
• Some Facebook time
• TV/Video Games
• Dinner
• Dessert
• Beverages of your choice (mine is Diet Coke of course
• Some final time in front of the TV or online
• Evening snack
• Cuddle time with your BFF (you decide what that looks like...)

What do you think? The perfect Dad Day? How about this instead?

Wake up at 7:30 AM to your wife baking in the kitchen. Smells good, but, nope, not for you, at least not for today. Zucchini bread that will be frozen for your vacation trip in two weeks. Your breakfast ends up being coffe and a Pop Tart. Get showered and ready for church so you can be there by 9 AM to set up sound equipment. Get into argument with eldest daughter about whether or not she will be wearing shorts to church. Leave house late and POd.

Get to church to find entire room empty from VBS events the prior week. Set up, set up some more, and set up some more. Run through songs and learn the order as you missed rehearsal Tuesday night because you we're at the ER with your grandmother. Rehearsal goes remarkably well, and your lovely wife has all the right settings for the sound system. Sit down next to eldest daughter and start chatting as if nothing happened prior to leaving for church. Chat with the high school boys that seem to congregate around her. All is well. After prayer and during the morning greeting, you hug 3+1 of your daughters (3 adopted and one 21 year old who gets dad support from you).

Music portion of worship seems to go smoothly and a great Dad's Day sermon (although you wince a bit when the term "biological" father is used to refer to your human dad.) You decide to join the worship team for the Spanish music as well as you know all but one of the songs and you learn the last one while on the platform singing. After music, on to a packed Jr. High Sunday School class with three new students, including your middle daughter who just graduated up from the children's program. (She does a FANTASTIC job in there her first day, BTW.)

After church, you head to Nana and Papa's house for a late lunch (yummy BBQ meat!), some good conversation with all your in-laws (who are the farthest thing from outlaws) a game of Apples to Apples and some pie a-la-mode. You also get to open presents (nope, no ties, a never ending bag of summer shirts-6 in total). After you are done, you head home to drop off your wife and two youngest daughters before heading to the hospital to visit Grandma.

On the way home, your phone buzzes, and it is daughter number 5, another 20 something who appreciates you as a father figure in her life, with a gracious Dad's Day message. You drop off your wife and 2 youngest and head out to Mesa to the hospital with your eldest daughter. On the way there, you listen to her iPod on the radio and chat some.

You get to the hospital and are unable to go into the room as the nurses are doing something that needs a little privacy, so the two of you go sit down at the end of the hall and chat some more. You finally go in and the two of you chat with your 3 aunts, grandma, the RN and the CNA. You find out Grandma may be going home soon and will likely qualify for hospice services because her heart disease is no longer treatable (the medicine was doing more harm than good, and she wouldn't fare well having pacemaker surgery). Because she is only qualifying under this, all of her other medical issues will still be able to be treated! Your eldest daughter is an absolute angel during the entire visit and makes Grandma smile. You head back home, listening to her iPod (I actually think I like Lady Gaga) chatting with her, and crying.

You come home to a yummy dinner of taco salad and homemade guacamole (in the style of the Flying V). At the end of dinner, your wife gets up with a headache, but your daughters help clean up. As you are washing dishes, one daughter heads to bed. You stop her and ask her how her Father's Day was, to make sure ghosts of the past had not been tormenting her. She shares that her memories of her dad are a lot worse than the memories of her mom, so Fathers' Day is much easier than Mothers' Day. You hug her, tell her that you love her and that no matter how many dads she has, you will always love her AND her Heavenly Father will ALWAYS love her even more than ANY man on Earth, father or husband. She goes to bed, and you finish dishes with another daughter sitting reading at the counter behind you.

I can't talk to the end of the day yet, as these events were followed by me proofreading one of Cathy's papers, and typing this post, but looking back, I think today was more priceless than any day being pampered in front of the TV. I don't know about my daughters, but today is one Fathers' Day I won't forget and it had nothing to do with presents and everything to do with the time and conversations we shared with each other today.